Live Blog: The Oscars 2011
*Closes the red curtain*
12:45 To all those who stayed up, I bid farewell and good night. Hope this was a tolerable experience for the five, or four, or, yep, three, no, two who tuned in. To finalize, a curious No Ripcord fact: I've never written a film review for this site, yet I can't disallow my love for the movies. That's because I generally dislike writing film criticism - perhaps because I write films myself? Anyhow, this has been fun. Well, I'm off to lounge with the stars with my No Ripcord press pass, em, not. To those exclusively interested in the music side of things, I'll be writing and publishing a review of the new Papercuts album tomorrow. Adieu!
12:41 Final tally: 14/21. Considering my second choices (and refusal to listen to my gut instinct), I would've easily gotten eighteen right.
12:39 Final thought: No musical numbers made by Franco and Hathaway? A shocker - maybe it would've brightened things up a bit.
12:36 And the Best Picture Oscar goes to....The King's Speech. All that word of mouth paid off, but it only won four awards? Not exactly a sweeping victory. Weinstein must be gloating: this goes back to the glory days of Shakespeare in Love, English Patient, etc. In my humble opinion, the Social Network will age much better - or it will eternally be regarded as that Facebook movie.
12:31 Final Oscars fun fact: The most Oscars to any film that didn't also win Best Picture: 8 wins for Cabaret in 1972. It was the year in which the Godfather won.
12:29 We've just hit the three hour mark. This year, the Oscars have been cosideraly shorter, but doubly more dull. Is Spielberg presenting Best Picture again?
12:25 Colin Firth wins. Highly expected. But still, I'm really happy for him - an actor of great caliber finally gets his due. And I win as well: 14/20.
12:22 Jesse Eisenberg spotlight. Indie moment of the night. Thoughts of the music in Adventureland pop into my consciousness. Feel like cranking some Husker Du, but it's 12:23.
12:15 Best Actress: Natalie Portman did well enough, but her performance is not winning material. Maybe I'm prejudiced because I thought The Black Swan was grossly overrated? Either way, 13/19. Make a gratuitous lesbo scene, you're guaranteed winning results. She looks poised - I wanted a crying fest. Are these actors on Zoloft? Disappointing.
12:11 I just X'ed the Huffington Post live blog because it was downright idiotic. Substituting Oscars fun fact for bathroom break.
12:06 The Oscars are beginning to drag. Move along, will ya? Sofia Coppola suddenly comes into frame; she has pretty big teeth.
12:03 Two and a half hours in, I'm starting to blow fumes. And the Best Director goes to...Tom Hooper for the King's Speech. My gut had him to win, but I went with David Fincher. Really thought they'd give it to him. Tom gives the most heartfelt speech of the night. 12/18
11:58 Halle Berry homages Lena Horne. It was quite lovely. Though she pays respect to her for being a African-American woman, she probably didn't know who she was until this past weekend. Tribute ends with the following quote: "It's not the load that gets you down, it's the way you carry it." Well said.
11:53 What?!!!!! Celine Dion???? NOOOOOOO!!! Is this the big surprise of the night? Totally unexpected, yet totally unwanted.
11:48 Randy Newman wins; the sport makes joke about himself. Sort of makes me respect the man. Although, he doesn't shut up already...and there's still no orchestral cue. I told you his win was fixed. 12/17.
11:45 Since nobody cares about Gwyneth Paltrow's flat voice, here Oscars fun fact #5: The shortest film to win best picture was Marty in 1955, clocking in at 91 minutes. Annie Hall inches close - that one lasts 93 minutes.
11:41 James Franco tells dick jokes; I check my watch. *shrug*
11:35 The Social Network deservedly wins Best Editing. All those expertly handled spliced shots are pretty much what MAKE the film. 11/16 Oh, and Jude Law's makeup is freakishly similar to his robotic mien on A.I.
11:32 I'm always a sucker for these Oscar retrospectives. Bob Hope hosting the Oscars. Visual Effects= another expected win for Inception. 10/15 Is this an "inception" of things to come? Second bad joke of the night.
11:23 Best Documentary: no Bansky win, but I did! 9/14. The director (Joshua Kors) makes a good point - thankfully, it wasn't an elongated speech; kept it short and didn't make a statement. But then again, it was yet another unremarkable speech.
11:18 Am I actually listening to an auto-tune interpretation of Oscar nominees? I must be drunk already. But wait, it's actually for real: excuse me while I go to the toilet.
11:16 Almost two hours in, now my dad fell asleep. The moment everyone is waiting for gets closer: will Exit through the gift shop win, and will Bansky make an appearance?
11:10 Commercial time. Oscars fun fact time. Here's number 4: You must be wondering who's won the most Best Actor statuettes. Walter Brennan (all Best Supporting Actor) and Jack Nicholson (1 Best Actor, two Supporting) have both won three. By the way, I miss the days of always having Jack Nicholson with his black glasses on way up in front of the stage.
11:03 And here's the category I despise the most: Best Song. Of course, someone gets weepy over "My Heart will go on". Spacey plays classy - dude, you ain't Bobby Darin. Randy Newman, aka Oscars' crutch, should be the clear winner. He's contractually obligated to win.
10:58 The Wolfman wins, but I don't. That film had so late 80's F/X effects. Oh, and I just lost Costume Design. Two straight shuns. 8 out of 13. Alice gets two awards = I hurl a bit.
10:55 Oscars fun fact #3: The oldest Best Actress winner was Jessica Tandy (age 80) for Driving Miss Daisy in 1989.
10:54 Here's the the Brits: I just heard The Rumble Strips' "Boys & Girls in Love" in a Spanish commercial. Predictably, it was the first few piano keys/acoustic strum at the beginning of the song. Hey, you gotta pay the bills.
10:52 But I did get Inception right for Sound Editing. 8 out of 11. Yet again, they're praising Nolan; stop feeling bad for him because he wasn't nominated for Best Director. Oh, and this is the only category where you'll see Salt and Unstoppable nominated.
10:50 Ahh! I thought "Social Network" would win best Sound Mixing. 7 out of 10. No clear footprint of potential Best Picture win - Inception, King's Speech, and Social Network are pretty much even.
10:45 Reznor wins! 7 out of 9. Indie music websites fire up the motherboards to mention the only news that matters to them.
10:43 Confession time: I wasn't too impressed with Reznor's score. Still, it'd be great for him to beat the Zimmer powerhouse. And contrary to the other nominees, the score was actually the most consonant with the incidents presented in the film.
10:40 Aussies Bale and Kidman - teaming up nationalities is so boring. Who cares about Sound categories? Raise your hands...um, anyone?
10:33 Best Supporting Male: Christian Bale finally wins. Formidable performance, though I would've given the edge to Geoffrey Rush. Another ho-hum, let's name everyone in the production speech. 6 out of 8.
10:30 One hour in, my mom already fell asleep.
10:28 Usually, the Foreign Language Film is always an upset. I think "In a Better World" was the safe choice. I bet for the underdog and lost. 5/7
10:25 First Charlie Sheen joke of the night. Ding! Franco wears drag: girls think he looks oh-so-cute any how. Helen Mirren still looks so incredibly hot for her age; why oh why is Russell Brand on stage?!
10:18 By the way, those white outfits Brolin and Bardem are wearing sure look translucent. Literally. King's Speech wins. 5 out of 6. David Siedler makes first f-you to the speech timer of the night.
10:15 Screenplay time! My favorite awards of the evening. Sorkin wins: great screenplay, even if you can really tell he's a computer illiterate. 4 out of 5.
10:12 Wow, this J Lo commercial is downright appalling. No one can actually see this because I'm writing from an Island. Hence, we get the same commercials they transmit in local islands in the Caribbean Sea. Her Spanish is getting worse.
10:08 Pixar wins yet again. I still feel irate because Up beat Fantastic Mr. Fox last year. 3/4 so far.
10:07 I really, really want to see The Illusionist! Anything with the Tati blueprint is gold.
10:05 Mila Kunis. I still remember seeing her in Aerosmith's video for "Jaded". And no, I'm not a fan. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vil-DtalfIE
10:00 Timberlake is boring the hell out of me. So, here's tonight's second fun fact: The last movie in black-and-white to win Best Picture: Schindler's List. Prior to that: The Apartment in 1960.
9:58 Kirk stalling; that was pretty funny. He must've overstayed his welcome, but he's savoring the moment. Melissa wins: 2/3. Even she got distracted - she was more emotive in the Golden Globes.
9:55 Kirk flirting with Anne Hathaway. Priceless. Even if Melissa will win, I'd give it to Jackie Weaver. Spellbinding performance! Leo automatically wins for most theatrical performance, but nailed the white trash motherly type fairly well. Hailee could be an upset: remember Anna Paquin in the Piano?
9:52 Kirk Douglas...this is Sparta-cus. First bad joke of the night.
9:47 Yay! Got Inception right. Contrary to the Alice and Wonderland winners, who were genuinely nervous, this guy just acknowledged Nolan and left. Boring speech.
9:45 0/1 already. Alice in Wonderland: anybody else thought this film was a snoozefest?
9:42 Tom Hanks, as graceful as ever. I'm digging the Oscar fun facts; dammit, my idea was already planned. Art Direction! If King's Speech doesn't win, I'll be greatly upset.
9:40 Marky Mark! Instantly feeling the vibration.
9:37 Coolest thing about the opening skit: DeLorean!
9:35 Um, I'm not really digging the SNL routine. Get with the show already.
9:30 Before the Oscars begin, I have to get my mouse. If I don't, I'm risking carpet tunnel. Fingers hurt already.
9:23 Oh no. They're revisiting Benigni's acceptance win. Any one see Pinocchio? One of the most annoying acceptance wins, but Sally Field's "You like me, you really like me!" speech tops the cake.
9:20 Ugh. I have to tolerate a boat full of uninspired Spanish commercials. And believe me, the Oscars are chock-full with commercials.
9:15 Oscars fun fact: The only X rated film to win Best Picture was Midnight Cowboy in 1969.
9:10 Is anyone paying attention to Ben Mankewicz, aka, I was fired from At the Movies. At least he was much better than Ben Lyons: he's basically a publicity machine and a celebrity hugger.
9:01 An observation: this is going to be one of the most predictable Oscars in quite some time. These are my educated (or not) guesses. Note: I haven't seen any of the short form categories, so I think it's irrelevant to try my hand at these.
Leading Actor: Colin Firth “The King’s Speech”
Supporting Actor: Christian Bale “The Fighter”
Leading Actress: Natalie Portman “Black Swan”
Supporting Actress: Melissa Leo “The Fighter”
Animated Feature: “Toy Story 3”
Art Direction: “The King’s Speech”
Cinematography: Inception”
Costume Design: “The King’s Speech”
Directing: “The Social Network”
Documentary Feature: “Inside Job”
Documentary Short: N/A
Film Editing: “The Social Network”
Foreign Language Film: “Incendies”
Makeup: “Barney’s Version”
Original Score: “The Social Network”
Original Song: “We Belong Together” from Toy Story 3
Animated Short Film : N/A
Live action Short Film: N/A
Sound Editing: “Inception”
Sound Mixing: “The Social Network”
Visual Effects: “Inception”
Adapted Screenplay: “The Social Network”
Original Screenplay: “The King’s Speech”
Best Picture: “The Social Network”
8:59 Well Mark, I can't stand Ryan Seacrest. I wisely avoided E! television.
8:54 Hey guys! Juan speaking. I have to say, I barely made it here. Of all days, I took a detour from my usual dull life by going to a freezing river. The highlight: almost falling my ass off due to a slippery rock. But enough about that: welcome to the Oscars. It's going to be a loooong night, so grab a beer and let's talk some movies. Oh, and I have to say that Joe is a tough act to follow. He's actually much more funnier than he gives himself credit for.
Welcome to No Ripcord's live blog for the 83rd Academy Awards ceremony.
*Opens the red curtain*
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